Ella McWoof: Today I’m here with Harold J. Hausenfeffer II, or as you probably know him, Kinzville’s foremost scientist, Goober.
Goober: And I’m glad to be here, Emma!
EM: Uh, it’s Ella.
G: Sorry about that! I know your name, Erma!
EM: ELLA. Anyway, Goober let’s start by having you tell our readers about what you’re working on in your lab these days.
G: Oh, so many things! I’ve got five key experiments on the go right now. I’m trying to figure out a formula for un-sticky glue, a way to make invisible hats, a potion to make me taller, one to make me shorter, and (of course), I’m still trying to figure out Great-Great Grandma Hausenfeffer’s secret brownie recipe.
EM: Brownie recipe?
G: Yes. It’s delicious. And one day I shall recreate it. Great-Great Grandma Hausenfeffer never wrote anything down, so it’s all a huge tasty trial and error to figure out the correct ingredients. I’ve eaten so many pans of brownies.
EM: Why would you want to make un-sticky glue?
G: In case you glued something somewhere that it shouldn’t be. Then you could just un-stick it and move it somewhere else.
EM: And an invisible hat?
G: I’m hoping it won’t give you hat hair. We still have to test that hypothesis.
EM: It all makes sense now. What about your family, Goober? Do they inspire you to experiment?
G: Other than Great-Great Grandma? Sure! Of course they do, Emily. My family has always supported my experimenting, even when I accidentally blew up the garden shed three times. In one afternoon.
EM: Wow. They sound really patient. Does your little brother, Booger, have any scientific aspirations?
G: Oh, no. Booger is more of a math guy. Do you know, the last time he was in my lab, he ruined an experiment by accidentally turning my test tube of pond rocks into these clear, glassy stones?
EM: Like diamonds?
G: Hm, I don’t know if they were diamonds. No matter, I didn’t need them. I just needed pond rocks for my experiment.
EM: But…diamonds?
G: No. Pond rocks.
EM: Uh, OK. How about five fast questions?
G: OK, but not too fast.
EM: Favorite food?
G: Oh, well. Let’s see…I think I’d have to say brownies. Even though I’ve eaten a lot of them recently. Did I tell you about that, Esme?
EM: You mentioned it. Favorite Color?
G: Definitely chartreuse.
EM: Favorite family member?
G: I’d probably say my brother Booger. When he’s not messing things up in my lab, that is.
EM: Favorite place to vacation?
G: Oh, Esmerelda. There’s no time for a scientist to go on vacation! Science never rests and neither does Goober!
EM: If you had a million KinzCash, you would:
G: Hmm…that’s a tough one. I think I’d probably start a club for other science-minded individuals like myself. I’d also buy a new set of test tubes.
EM: Well, thanks so much for being here today, Goober. Best of luck with all your experimenting!
G: No, thank YOU Etta.
EM: ELLA!
I know this article is simply ancient, but I felt the need to comment on it. This is my favorite interview! Goober’s characterization is so amazing. The fact that he’s so obsessed with his absurd experiments that he adamantly discarded diamonds in favor of pond rocks for his experiment is hilarious. Not to mention his apparent love for brownies. I wish you guys would do more stuff with Goober, because I think he’s a really interesting character!
haha. Very interesting interview guys. Funny how Goober kept getting Ella’s name wrong hahah. I guess he cant hear right. Can u interview Persephone next maybe?
How did he get Esmeralda out of Ella? Lol
LOL LOL LOL!!!!
Haha, I know how you feel Ella, people ALWAYS screw up my name. They call me Victoria, Venessa, or Valerie, but can never seem to remember my name is Veronica!
Funny. Esme, good interview! (LOL) I’m still hoping you’ll interview Dacey and Sparky’s parent’s, Ella.